{"id":45970,"date":"2022-08-26T21:17:12","date_gmt":"2022-08-26T21:17:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.firstthingsfirst.org\/?post_type=first-things&p=45970"},"modified":"2022-09-21T21:34:03","modified_gmt":"2022-09-21T21:34:03","slug":"keys-to-co-parenting-young-children","status":"publish","type":"first-things","link":"https:\/\/www.ftf-stg.magnetry.com\/es\/first-things\/keys-to-co-parenting-young-children\/","title":{"rendered":"Keys to co-parenting young children"},"content":{"rendered":"

Parenting is hard. Even with the support of a loving partner or spouse, all parents have days when they feel overwhelmed and stressed.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Co-parenting is hard, too, with its own unique challenges. The term describes two parents sharing the responsibility of raising their child, though they are no longer partners in a relationship. With more than <\/span>400,000 kids under 5<\/span><\/a> living in Arizona, it\u2019s safe to say that upwards of 120,000 young children and families are navigating co-parenting situations in our state, <\/span>according to 2020 Census data<\/span><\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n

Co-parenting is a unique journey for every family. But, there\u2019s no need to fear. By keeping the child\u2019s needs at the forefront, parents can support their little one\u2019s healthy development and create a new normal that nurtures the whole child. <\/span><\/p>\n

Child-centered Co-parenting: the Three C\u2019s<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Cooperation, consistency and communication are three keys to healthy co-parenting, according to early childhood expert Liz Santiago, program director of the United Way of Pinal County\u2019s Family, Friend and Neighbor program.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cEspecially in situations where two people once were together, <\/span>adults have a lot of big feelings<\/span><\/a>,\u201d Santiago said. \u201cIt\u2019s important to remember that the child comes first.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Cooperation<\/strong><\/h3>\n

As a parent, you will always be connected in some way to your child\u2019s other parent. That\u2019s why it\u2019s best to make the decision to cooperate with one another sooner rather than later.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Cooperation looks like keeping your promises, doing what you say you\u2019re going to do when you\u2019re going to do it and committing to working with your child\u2019s other parent and not against them.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Drop offs and transitions can be a great way to put this into practice.<\/span><\/p>\n

Instead of picking your child up from their co-parents house, Willard recommends having that parent drop them off. This is a subtle adjustment that can make a huge difference in your child\u2019s perspective.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThis creates a common ground between both parents,\u201d Willard said. \u201cIf I\u2019m dropping off, and he\u2019s dropping off, it\u2019s never \u2018I\u2019m going to pick up and take them away\u2019 from any activity,\u201d she explained.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

This may not always be possible, so another alternative is meeting at a neutral location. Even in this situation, parents can use the \u201cdrop off\u201d approach. When you meet at a neutral location, one parent can walk the child to the other parent’s car to drop them off. That way, the child goes from love to love and never feels like they\u2019re being taken away.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Consistency\u00a0<\/strong><\/h3>\n

One challenge for children in co-parenting situations is having to figure out how to live in two separate homes, situations and conditions.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYoung children thrive off of routines,\u201d Willard said.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Creating regular routines helps children know what to expect and that helps them feel stable and gives them a sense of control.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf I was sitting here right now and I didn\u2019t know who was going to pick me up, where I was going and who I was going with, I would have anxiety. I wouldn\u2019t know what was happening next in my life,\u201d Santiago said.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

She recommends making sure that children always have these questions answered:<\/span><\/p>\n