{"id":35843,"date":"2021-01-19T16:55:33","date_gmt":"2021-01-19T16:55:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/localhost\/ftf\/?post_type=first-things&#038;p=35843"},"modified":"2022-12-06T16:21:18","modified_gmt":"2022-12-06T16:21:18","slug":"positive-parenting-see-things-through-their-eyes","status":"publish","type":"first-things","link":"https:\/\/www.ftf-stg.magnetry.com\/es\/first-things\/positive-parenting-see-things-through-their-eyes\/","title":{"rendered":"Positive Parenting: See things through their eyes"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/-xyMENRi4SU\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Toddlers have very big feelings and very little self-control, a combination that can erupt at any moment into crying, screaming, throwing things, throwing themselves on the ground (at home or in public) and other toddler meltdowns. Over what? Anything from the proverbial spilled milk to the color of the pajamas they want (demand!) to wear to bed. (And don\u2019t bother explaining that their eyes will be closed while they sleep so the color of their pjs doesn\u2019t matter. Little ones aren\u2019t rational either.)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Of course, it\u2019s completely normal for them to be as emotional and unreasonable as they can be. The part of the brain responsible for self-control is undeveloped in young children. (And won\u2019t be fully developed until adulthood, around age 25.) Even toddlers who are very verbal and seem more advanced in their development will still have very little self-control.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That all makes sense. But in the heat of the moment, when you\u2019re tired or stressed out or in a hurry, your toddler\u2019s toddlerness can drive you a little crazy. (That\u2019s normal, too.)<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"size-full wp-image-36156 alignnone\" style=\"color: #666666; font-size: 1rem;\" src=\"https:\/\/www.ftf-stg.magnetry.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/01\/Positive-Parenting-Label-1.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1000\" height=\"312\" \/><\/h2>\n<h2>Positive Parenting<\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One way to do your best as a parent is to<b> understand or imagine your child\u2019s point of view, especially during tough moments<\/b>. It helps to remember that your child\u2019s perspective is very different from yours. They&#8217;re driven by emotions, not by logic. Things that are little to you can feel very big to them. Not being able to find their favorite blanket is devastating. The tower of blocks falling over is a disaster. The pajamas are an international crisis.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Imagining your child\u2019s point of view is one part of <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ftf-stg.magnetry.com\/resources\/positive-parenting\/\"><b>positive parenting<\/b><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, an approach that recognizes both the joys and challenges of raising a young child. Developed by our partners at <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.zerotothree.org\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">ZERO TO THREE<\/a><\/strong>, positive parenting isn\u2019t about being perfect or always being cheerful. In the good moments and also when things haven\u2019t gone right, positive parenting helps you focus on building a loving relationship with your child.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">No parent handles every hard, frustrating, inconvenient situation with their child perfectly. Everyone makes mistakes. Seeing things through your child\u2019s eyes and understanding their seemingly extreme behavior as part of their normal development makes it easier (but not always easy) to react with calm and empathy instead of frustration or anger. Like the song says, try to remind yourself that \u201cThey\u2019re small and they\u2019re still learning.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<h2>Managing Your Emotions and Expectations<\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your toddler\u2019s emotional, irrational behavior is normal and to be expected. They\u2019re not trying to make you crazy. Knowing that can help you stay calm and respond more positively when they\u2019re losing control. In doing so, you help your child to learn \u2014 little by little, over time \u2014 to cope with their feelings, solve problems and manage their behavior.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cParents who are calm and regulated themselves are modeling that kind of behavior, too,\u201d says Dr. Tracy Spinrad of Arizona State University, whose research focuses on the social-emotional development of young children. \u201cSo it\u2019s an added plus to try to hold it together!\u201d<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And when you don\u2019t handle a situation perfectly in the moment, seeing things through their eyes can help you recognize it and respond with love to repair the relationship. That\u2019s positive parenting in action.<\/span><\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<table style=\"height: 33px; width: 100%; border-collapse: collapse; background-color: #f3f3f3; margin: 30px 0;\" cellpadding=\"45%\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"width: 100%;\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"size-full wp-image-35643 alignnone\" src=\"https:\/\/www.ftf-stg.magnetry.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/positiveparentingheader-01.png\" alt=\"Positive Parenting Header\" width=\"2175\" height=\"846\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Positive Parenting is presented in partnership with ZERO TO THREE,<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> a national nonprofit working to ensure that all babies and toddlers have a strong start in life. ZERO TO THREE&#8217;s approach to supporting parents is based on the belief that parents are the true experts on their children, and that there is no \u201cone-size-fits-all\u201d approach to raising children.\u00a0 <a href=\"https:\/\/www.zerotothree.org\/resources\/positive-parenting\/\">Learn more <i class=\"fa fa-arrow-circle-right \" ><\/i><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The definition of positive parenting referenced above was developed by a ZERO TO THREE committee of staff, board members and fellows; \u00a9 ZERO TO THREE 2018.<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Understanding your child&#8217;s point of view can help you stay calm when they&#8217;re losing it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":36016,"template":"","tags":[38,73,313,314],"class_list":["post-35843","first-things","type-first-things","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","tag-toddlers","tag-social-emotional-development","tag-positive-parenting","tag-zero-to-three"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v25.8 (Yoast SEO v27.1.1) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Positive Parenting: See things through their eyes - First Things First<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Toddlers have very big feelings and very little self-control. 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